Do people bother you with shitty “settle down” questions and advices? Don’t worry! Now you don’t have have to hide yourself from such people. Confront them with these savage comebacks and leave their mouths hanging. Here is a list of 12 kickass replies for people who ask you to “settle down”. Hope these replies help you eliminate such annoying people from your life. Because you don’t want such kind of negativity in your life. Good luck!
1. Because a wedding is expensive. Would you be willing to sponsor the whole thing?
No? Then would you mind fucking off?
2. Is that what you do for a living? Go around telling people to settle down and offer free yet useless life advice?
Please try somewhere else. Thank you!
3. OMG! I’m so glad you asked! Do you have any hot guys/chicks you could set me up with?
Because I can’t find any. I’m sure you’ll be willing to help me.
4. Because I’m already in a serious relationship with my career and I ain’t screwing this one up!
My career won’t decide to leave me, out of nowhere, unlike most people nowadays.
5. Why settle for one husband/wife at home when you can have three boyfriends/girlfriends in the same city?
Yes! Judge me because I don’t give an eff!
6. If I do settle down, will you promise to leave me alone?
I’m sure you won’t. That’s why I won’t settle down.
7. As Cher Horowitz says, ‘You see how picky I am about my shoes, and they only go on my feet’
Do these replies hurt you? I hope they do.
8. And when marriage knocks at my door, what do I say? Not today.
That’s what I do. All the fucking time!!
9. The slight possibility is that I haven’t found Mr/Ms Right yet.
Because no one is as perfect as me. But I still chose to continue my hunt.
10. Because then you’ll start annoying me with questions about why don’t I have kids already.
And I don’t want to throw such harsh replies on your face.
11. Oops, I’m married. Did I forget to invite you to my wedding? God! I’m so careless.
Now, will you mind leaving me all alone?
12. I wonder the same thing all the time. It’s just that stupid things like charting out a career path and completing my education keep coming in my way.
Life, you see!